Excerpt for Born To Be A Queen by , available in its entirety at Smashwords

Born To Be A Queen







By Ronnie






Chapter 1: A Star Is Born



1990

In Harvey, one of the very urban neighborhoods of Chicago was a young girl named Delilah Jenkins, who had a boyfriend an soon to be husband, Roger, but 4 months ago he was shot in a drive by and at 20 she was single, pregnant and was ready to give birth to her son. At Ingalls Hospital not far from her house Delilah was about to go into a labor, with her aunt Bessie, Rogers mom Duranice and some friends



"Oooooh ooooh this hurts!" Said Delilah in pain 



"Don't worry it's just a contraction they pass, I'm goin to get some gloves miss Jenkins, hang in there!" Said the doctor 



"So baby, we know we need to talk about how you gon care for this child...." Bessie said 



"Auntie don't start, okay we talked about it and I'm keepin my baby, besides I don't want no white folks I don't know raisin my child!" 



"Honey I see how you livin, and you only got 250 dollars in that cookie jar, Delilah baby this child needs a better life than this! The streets killed Roger, yo momma, and yo brother......and I'm sorry but we can't mess up this one!" Bessie stated 



"Ok last time I checked I'm pushing this baby out okay, besides I have you, I have Duranice an Miss Mableton over in Roseland she can watch my baby while I work!" 



"Bessie leave the girl alone, she gon have the odds stacked against her with or without this baby, just be glad she ain't laid out in the gutter or whoring around like these other girls!" Duranice shouted 



"Look I know Delilah is gon be a wonderful mother but let's face facts, it'll be impossible for her to make it!" 



"Auntie.......I'm willing to take that risk!" Delilah said 



After that tense moment the doctor came back in and was ready to deliver the baby. Delilah was uncertain herself about the future but she was determined to give the baby the best she could do! 45 minutes later the baby was born, and Delilah held him in her arms, and just looked at him with so much happiness, 



"So what you gon name him honey?" Bessie asked 



"Ronnie, Ronnie Roger Jenkins!" 



"Oh you used his late father’s name as his middle, if Roger were here he be so happy, imma pray for you guys and remember Delilah, it you need any help whatsoever you come right over ya hear!" Duranice said 



"Yes Miss Duranice thank you!" 



"Well the umbilical cord is cut, the baby is completely healthy, you can go home in a hour or so the nurse will bring the papers!" Said the doctor 



"Thank you doctor!"



"Oooh look at him he so cute, honey I just know you'll be a great mother!"



"I bet he gon be a superstar when he grows up! 



"Well with god all things are possible......."



 

1998

8 years have passed an Ronnie was an eccentric lil boy, he was growing up so fast and Delilah eventually told him about his father being dead, Ronnie didn't seem too phased about it, but there was something else going on......Ronnie had a vibrant personality, some thought a lil too vibrant. Ronnie never told his mom this but at school the other boys would pick on him and call him "faggot" and "fruity ass nigga" among other things for the way he acts, the way he walks, playing jump rope with the girls instead of sports with the boys, sometimes Ronnie would come home from school with tears in his eyes because of the bullying, and would lie to his mom that he hurt his arm or something. But one thing that made him feel better was music, he listen to Whitney Houston especially and as he lip sync to her song "ALL THE MAN I NEED" he was feelin so much better and decided he wanted to a be a singer!



"Hey mommy, can I join the church choir?" Ronnie asked 



"I don't see why not, besides ain't nothin better for you than Jesus!" Said Delilah 



"Thank you, Hey mommy can I ask you another question?" Ronnie asked



"Sure baby what is it?"



"What’s a fruity ass nigga?" Ronnie asked 



"BOY WHERE YOU GET THAT LANGUAGE FROM!"



"The boys in school call me that, they think....well I don't know, I'm always playing double Dutch with the girls on the playground and I walk like Whitney Houston and I sing.....immmm everyyyy womaan!" 



And that's when Delilah knew that Ronnie was "different", nobody in her family was ever gay, and although it was too early to tell she kinda had a feeling inside that Ronnie was different, but Delilah decided not to put so much on Ronnie's shoulders and hoping that it was a phase,



"Honey listen, even if you are or not.....just remember momma always loves you, and don't let anybody call you somethin like that! You be yourself and you embrace that!" Said Delilah



"Thanks mommy!" Ronnie said 



That Sunday Ronnie joined the church choir and when it was time to sing, his voice wowed everybody, even tho he made a few mistakes, it was still clearer than most 8 year olds! After the choir he went outside to play with the other kids, and even the church Ronnie's personality began to show and some kids liked it, but elders including aunt Bessie were growing concern....



"Delilah you need to do something about Ronnie he a lil too fruity!" 



"Bessie he'll grow out of it okay!" 



"You better nip that in the bud, I'm tellin you they have names for boys who act like Ronnie does!" 



Look he'll be alright, at least he wants to join the choir," 



"Yes baby get Ronnie into gods house, get him away from that homosexual spirit," 



Ronnie loved Shiny and glittery things, and it wasn't until when the Sunday school teacher played a movie "Cinderella" with Ronnie's favorite idol....Whitney Houston! And when Ronnie saw the gowns Cinderella wore he was mesmerized an when he got home, Ronnie would go into the bathroom and turn his towel into like a gown, and put a rag over his head like he had hair! Ronnie felt the inner diva in him coming out, and as he go thru his teen years he would definitely find out who he really is....as well as some other experiences.







Chapter 2: Finding Himself….



2007

Time flew by as Ronnie was already 17 years old and in high school, he also dropped a bomb on his mom a year or two ago....he was gay. Even though Delilah hoped that vibrant personality when he was little was just a phase, she was at least glad that Ronnie came out to her instead of hiding it! Ronnie was in Chicago Fundamental high school and he was fully himself....his wild fashion, his feminine attitude and of course his singing voice, for he had talent! Ronnie had way more friends than before and Laureesha his day one bitch, and Marlo his other homegirls. Ronnie was kinda promiscuous, and was always eyeballing niggas such as Tyrese on the basketball team, Ronnie had a huge crush on him...Ronnie and his homegirls were eating lunch and their table had a perfect view of those fine ass niggas!!



"Damn he sexy as fuck!" Ronnie said  



"Omg bitch yesss, he be perfect for you Ronnie!" said Laureesha 



"Ugh but they all straight tho...”



"Ronnie boo I'm pretty sure at least one of them is gay I mean you know niggas curious these days, braggin bout pussy knowin they ass is gay in the low!" Said Marlo 



"Well I got gym class with him so lemme work my gay boy magic...." 



It was during gym class an Ronnie hated it, all those stank sweaty immature boys talkin bout pussy just irked his soul! But soon all the other boys left and Ronnie had to use the bathroom at the last minute....the stalls were disgusting, but he had a full bladder an couldn't wait! After Ronnie was done he walked out to get his things and thinkin he was the only one left he decided to blast his music, Trina the rapper, but then as he was strutin down the hall feelin like a bad bitch, he saw Tyrese change clothes and his ass was just so phat, and his print was showing in draws....it was hangin an swangin, and his buff chocolate body was an added bonus! All this made Ronnie let out a lil moan, and Tyrese heard it!!



"What you lookin at my booty for nigga!" He shouted 



"Oh I'm sorry but....nigga you too fine!!" 



Then Tyrese came closer to Ronnie, and at first Ronnie thought he was gon get beat up, but Tyrese instead dropped a bombshell...



"Look don't say nothin to nobody, but I'm gay too!" Tyrese said 



"Really, but you so manly and you talk bout pussy and...."



"Look all that shit is a front, besides I like both but I like guys more, and I kinda like the way you walk!" Tyrese said 



"Well that's my booty it's all thanks to Popeyes and jiffy cornbread!" 



"Hey you know, I know this like gay bar near the loop, its the shit we should go like tonight I mean it's Friday," says Tyrese 



"And what about yo boys?" 



"Like I said don't tell nobody, I'm tryna make college team and they don't want no gay nigga, so keep it on the DL...."



And as soon as Ronnie heard that, he jumped at the chance, Tyrese was FINE, and he was gay too....now if he got a 9 plus inch dick....Ronnie would risk it all!!! Later on that night Ronnie was about to leave and he put on some tight shorts, a crop top an some sneakers ooooh he was fabulous! Delilah embraced his son with open arms, and even after most of the church was ashamed of Ronnie, his mama comforted him thru the bullying and everything! 



"So where you off to lookin cute?" Delilah asked 



"I'm meeting with my freinds we goin out for a bit!" Ronnie lied since you had to be 18 to get in the club



"Oh okay, have fun an don't stay out too late these niggas start shooting,"



"I won't bye mama!" 



Then as Ronnie went out the door he headed towards the train station to go downtown. Now Ronnie lived in Harvey and he knew the rough patches he has to walk thru knowing his gay ass could be jumped or bullied at any moment, but Ronnie wasn't 8 no more and he knew how throw a punch as gay as he was! When Ronnie got to the club Thyckness, he saw Tyrese standing line waiting for him, 



"Are you sure bout this like I ain't 18!"



"Don't worry bout it they'll let you in!"



Then it was Ronnie an Tyrese turn to go inside, Ronnie just showed them his ID hoping they won't notice, and oddly enough.....it worked! Both boys were inside the club and it was poppin, Tyrese went over to some of the male dancers and started smacking their asses makin it rain, then Ronnie saw a pole and decided to work it! He had some moves and with the bangin music he made his booty jiggle and let Tyrese grab on it!



"Damn yo ass phat!!" Shouted Tyrese



"Yessss nigga yesss!" Ronnie shouted as Tyrese felt on his booty 



Then a stage was lit up, it was time for Milwaukee Marla to perform. She was a drag queen with fabulous style and just had an enormous stage presence, and when Ronnie saw this queen he was mesmerized, her dress, her heels, and her makeup was something that captured Ronnie attention!



"Omg Milwaukee Marla is like a goddess!" Tyrese said 



"Wait you like drag queens too?" 



"Yeah, but don't tell nobody tho..."



"Yessss yessss darlings, miss Milwaukee Marla is here to give you a good ass show, imma do a lil karaoke  but I want a lucky boy to come up an join me...who got the balls to sing wit me!"



Then Ronnie raised his hand, he knew he wanted to be on stage and it just like the church choir....just gay men in the audience! Milwaukee Marla saw Ronnie and his wild fashion was like yesss! 



"Honey you are fuckin snatched, I mean look at this bawwwdy I'm jealous....don't he look sexy y'all wit the small waist!!" Said Milwaukee Marla as the crowd agreed 



Then Milwaukee Marla asked Ronnie what he wanted to sing, and Ronnie chose "Count On Me" by of course Whitney Houston and Cece Winans, and it just so happened to be one of Marla's favorite songs too. When Ronnie did Whitney's verse the crowd was amazed and then when it came to the higher parts of the song Ronnie knocked it out the park!! His voice was something and the crowd loved it!!



"Damn honey, you tryna take my job (laughs) YOU CAN SANG, AINT HE SOMETHIN YALL!!" Milwaukee Marla shouted as she acknowledged Ronnie 



And at that moment Ronnie realized how talented he was, and maybe drag is somethin he should consider.......after that fun night Tyrese actually had a car an took Ronnie home, but while Tyrese was still parked, Ronnie decided to try his luck with this nigga!



"So you really bisexual?" Ronnie asked 



"Well I been with girls and it was alright but I had some niggas on the side and they was way better but I never had my dick sucked by another boy before, is it true that boys do it better than girls?" Tyrese asked 



"Well I can show you more than I can tell you...." 



"Oh Really, aight show me what that mouth do....."



Then Tyrese pulled out this long dick and Ronnie was amazed, but he showed Tyrese that "gay boy magic" and Tyrese couldn't handle Ronnie's 5 star head game! After those heavenly 5 minutes Tyrese really switched sides!! But because of his reputation he still wanted to keep it on the DL, Ronnie didn't know how to feel about that. Ronnie soon called Laureesha and told them all what happened!



"Gurl yessss he confronted me in the locker room then he told me he was gay and he took me to this gay bar......."



"Ooooooop a gay bar, damn see I told you Ronnie these niggas gay!" Said Laureesha  



"I know right, but anyways he was smacking the male dancers ass and then I got on a pole and he was all up in my cakes gurl!" 



"Omg he grabbed yo booty!" 



"Grabbed it, smacked it, blessed it gurl he was LOVIN it, anyways then this drag queen came out and I got on stage an we sang together and the crowd loved me like I felt so special!" 



"Bitch I been told you that you can sang!"



"But gurl that ain't best part......I sucked that boys dick, I choked on it like a Popeyes biscuit!! And he was grabbing my head beggin me to stop, even after he bussed I still kept on suckin!" 



"OH MY GAWD NIGGA YOU SUCKED HIM, WELL I AINT MAD AT YOU BABY YOU WAS FEENIN FOR HIM I BET HE LOVES YOU NOW!"



"Gurl he still wants to be on the DL like I don't know if I can pretend to ignore him an watch him kiss girls with the same lips that eats my booty! 



"Well honey give him some time maybe he'll be public with it......but as far as your singing goes I think you should be a drag queen like you be real fabulous like I can picture it yesssss!"



An then Ronnie gave it some thought, that night at the gay club was like a sign that maybe this is somethin he should do, and Ronnie didn't know it yet, but somebody will recognize his talent......





Chapter 3: Miss Renee Harvey

After Ronnie discovered that he had a knack for entertainment, he decided to show it off at the school talent show, he borrowed a leotard from the dance department and found some heels in his size and decided to put on a lace front wig and he was fabulous! His makeup artist Friend Kaleem beat his face for the gawds!! RONNIE WAS LOOKIN SO FABULOUS! But he needed a name tho,


"Bitch you look fabulous as fuck yesss slay these hoes!!" 


"I know, this hair is so me like i love flipping it like yes imma bad bitch!" 


"Well alright now, what you gon perform?" 


"I'm gonna do upgrade you by Beyoncé,"


"Ooooh I can't wait, but one more thing tho, you need a name!"


"Like what?" Ronnie asked


"How about Royonce, you know Ronnie and Beyoncé mixed together!" Kaleem stated 


"Nah I don't really like that, I want something that represent where I come from.....MISS RENEE HARVEY, cause I'm from Harvey and I like Renee," 


"Ooooh okay!"


Then it was time for Renee to do her thang, as she approached the crowd at first she was kinda nervous, but then as the music came on...RENEE SLAYED! Dippin it low, dropping it like it hot, shaking those hips I mean she did that! Tyrese was in the audience with his baller friends and a girl. They was booing Renee, and Tyrese kinda just sat there smiling, Renee was moving kinda fast to notice but when she saw Tyrese smiling, she knew he was still genuine. But the majority of the crowd loved her and when Renee was done she received standing ovation and won first prize of the talent contest! Friends congratulated her backstage and Ronnie felt the love and even more of a drive to do this!


"YOU DID IT SIS!!!" Marlo shouted 


"Yesss honey the crowd loved you!!!"  Laureesha said 


"And that lil shimmy you did oooooh it gave me life!" Kaleem shouted 


"Thank you all, ooooh I feel so good chile, and are these flowers for me, awww y'all shouldn't have!" 


"Flowers, we didn't give you no flowers!" Said Marlo 


"Then who these from?" Ronnie asked 


"From me....." said Tyrese as he surprised everybody 


"Tyrese, oh I um didn't know you were watching," Ronnie blushed 


"We gon leave y'all alone, cmon y'all lets go." Said Marlo 


Then both Ronnie and Tyrese was in the room alone, and Tyrese soon told Ronnie how he really felt..


"I saw you in the crowd with that girl, you forgot about me already," said a sassy Ronnie 


"Oh Tisha, nah she ain't all that, besides they don't know yet about my true self, and then there was that other night," 


"What she sucks better dick that's why you brought her over here?" 


"No, I just wanted to say, I wanna see you again, just that nobody can't see us together...."


"Ugh you bein undercover, just let it out!!" Ronnie shouted 


"I can't, I just can't alright remember my reputation, it just makes things more complicated for me.....so you wanna go back to Thyckness tommorow night?" Tyrese Asked


"Tyrese I think we should stop seeing each other, I can't with you DL niggas it's too complicated, so I won't tell nobody I sucked your dick but that's that!" Ronnie said (even tho he told Marlo)


"Alright then, I’ll um See you when I see you I guess,"


Then Tyrese left, but he left the Flowers tho, and Ronnie kinda experienced his first little heartbreak. But soon all that was overshadowed with the trophy Ronnie won! He went home an showed it to Delilah, who had to work that evening an couldn't make it, but she was super proud of her son!


"Momma look, I won first prize," 


"Oooooh son that's wonderful!"


"Yeah, I think this drag queen stuff is something I should really do I mean the crowd gave me a standing ovation," 


"Wow they really liked you huh,"


"Yeah, I don't know mama, I really like doing this...."


Then Delilah kinda sat and thought about this. Her son being a drag queen? She knew it's what he wanted and it's something productive but this was kinda a hard one, Delilah knew her son was talented as fuck and he always had a huge personality but heels, makeup, dresses an wigs....she decided to talk Bessie over a cup of coffee an get her opinion,


"Honey I don't know I told you to nip this gay thing in the bud and now this what you get, a cross dresser!" Bessie's stated 


"Look I told him that I support him thru thick an thin and whatever he does, and he seems real happy I mean Bessie you know the child is talented, and if this is dream then I can't snatch it away from him!" Delilah said 


"A cross dresser, baby, I'll take anything to get sweet child Ronnie out this ghetto but I was hoping he do it as a man not no fake Diana Ross!"


"His young ass don't know who Diana Ross is okay, and second of all, he's my child, in uniform or in a dress I'm gonna love him the way he is, and you should too Bessie, I love my baby and if that's gods will then that's his will," 


And Bessie knew she couldn't say anything, Ronnie loved drag and she decided that if this is what he's good at, then she support him...



2008

A couple months has passed since Ronnie first did his drag show, and in that time frame Miss Renee Harvey did some drag showcases in the local clubs around the Southside, wearing dresses he made himself and heels from the thrift store but he made it work (lyin about his age too). But Ronnie was officially 18 and there was one drag competition he really wanted to enter, Gays Got Talent, which held in the Crown Theater during the week of Chicago pride....it was a huge deal! Ronnie wanted to audition but he was kinda nervous,


"What if I can't do it what if I'm too ugly?" Ronnie lamented 


"Don't worry baby you'll do fine," said Delilah


"You think so?" 


"I know so, chile you have talent and you can sang your ass off so go head and do it!" 


Then Ronnie, decided to put on a purple glittery gown he just made, some black heels, a shortcut wig and some lipstick and miss Renee Harvey came out to play! She went with his mother an her freinds were there too watching from their seats, they knew he was gonna slay! The judges called miss Renee to the stage, an she chose to sing a portion of "All The Man I Need" by Whitney Houston, Ronnie's fav singer, and when Renee opened her mouth the judges were amazed, and her freinds an mom in audience were blown away too! After all the talents were finished the judges made a decision,


"All of you we're amazing, but only 1 can be the winner, and the gold medal goes too....the Toxic Lesbians, ugh the way y'all danced to that song was just unbelievable,"


And Renee was kinda flatlined, he didn't even win second or third place either!! Delilah knew her son would be upset so she went backstage to comfort him,


"You alright honey?" 


"I could be better, but at least I tried,"


"Well hey look at it this way, you now in front of bigger crowds!" Delilah said 


"I guess, can we get some pizza I'm hungry as hell!" 


Then Ronnie decided to change into his normal clothes, but once he left the dressing room, he was approached by someone,


"Are you miss Renee Harvey?"


"Yes I am, um do I know you?" Ronnie asked 


"You will soon, I'm Lucky, imma LGBT talent manager, I had to say those judges passed over a great talent, them ugly girls didn't deserve to win I mean you got it goin on....um do you have a minute?" 


"Well look I gotta be goin and unless this about money....."


"That's exactly what this is about, I wanna manage you and make you a superstar, Ronnie or Renee I should say, you can be somethin huge, just sign with me and I'll take you to new heights you'll be on top in no time!" 


"Well do you have like an office we can do this at,"


"My office is in New Orleans, one of the hottest gay cities, I have my contract in my suitcase um where's your agent?"


"I ain't his agent but I'm his mama, what's this?" Delilah asked 


"Ma'am I wanna sign your son, he has talent and I wanna nurture that, I'm tellin you he'll be a superstar in the gay community, the next Sylvester! All I'm sayin if you sign this contract you'll have shows booked in the biggest theaters across the nation, a pad paid for by my company in New Orleans and a $6,000 sign on advance, the world is waiting Ronnie!!" Said Lucky 


"Wow mom, I mean, I'll be out of Harvey forever, this could be a good thing," Ronnie said 


And when Delilah heard that she knew that Ronnie had a point, he may never get this type of opportunity here in Chicago ever again! So with her trust in Jesus and a leap of faith, Ronnie signed that contract and it was official, HE WAS GETTING OUT OF THE GHETTO AND GOIN TO THE BIG EASY! But down the line Lucky would show his true colors...and Ronnie might have some regrets.



Chapter 4: Superstar

It was summer 08, and Ronnie had promised Lucky that after he graduated high school he would move to New Orleans an begin his promising entertainment career! It was mid June and Ronnie was packing his bags for his life changing trip,



"Hey honey, how you feeling?" Delilah asked 



"To be honest, I'm kinda nervous, I never been so far away from home before....oh momma I don't know if I'm doing the right thing or not!" Ronnie lamented 



"Ronnie don't worry, this is what you wanted right, besides you got lucky, who being a drag queen would get you out this hell hole!" Delilah said 



"You're right, oooooh mama thank you!" 



"For what?" 



"For not disowning me or callin me a fag like everybody else does, I know I ain't a woman I got a dick an balls it's just entertainment that's all, some folks just don't get that I'm gay!" 



"Ronnie what I tell you, I will always love you whatever road you go down in life, so what you're gay, I rather have you gay than gangsta, don't worry what the rest of the world thinks...be yourself!" Encouraged Delilah 



Then Ronnie gave his mom a big hug, and they both shed a few tears so filled with emotions. Deep down Delilah didn't really want Ronnie to go, but she knew he needed better than the hoods of Harvey. Ronnie took the train to O'Hare and for the first time he was on his own! Ronnie said goodbye to all his friends and    Hoped for the best in the big easy!



NEW ORLEANS



The plane touched down at the airport and Lucky had a car sent for Ronnie to be picked and while in the car Ronnie saw a whole new world! All the lush trees, the mighty Mississippi River, the streetcars there was just so much culture. Ronnie then saw all the gay flags on various New Orleans streets, which meant being a drag queen here wouldn't be an issue unlike all the haters back in Chicago. The car then took Ronnie to this rental in the neighborhood of Bayou Saint John, where it was a furnished studio on the third floor. Ronnie was so glad, I instantly called Kaleem,



"Omg chile I got my own place you should see this I got a balcony an everythang!" 



"A balcony okaaay Ronnie I see you, thinkin you in gone with the wind!" Kaleem joked



"Nigga I got a view of the French quarter and there's like so many gays here, I think I might catch me a few cuties (laughs)!" Ronnie joked 



"Omg you is so crazy, but stay focused boo on the reason why you there, to slay as miss Renee!" Said Kaleem



"Alright alright How's everything goin?" Lucky asked as he came outta nowhere 



"Oh shit I gotta go it's business, bye (hangs up phone) it's really something Lucky, I mean wow I never had it like this before!" Ronnie said 



"Well trust me once you really get to the top you'll have wayyyyy bigger, but first order of business......you need a makeover!" Lucky said 



"Why what's wrong with me?" 



"Oh nothing is wrong, we just wanna enhance the look, I mean new wigs, new dresses, and some new heels STAT! See you can't be singing like Whitney Houston lookin tore up like Nicole Richie," 



Ok, when do I perform?" Ronnie asked 



"In the next few days it's a really big show this will really give you the exposure you need, which is why you need the makeover, this is Cindy, she will be your stylist if you will.....Cindy I want you to bring out the over the top diva which is Renee Harvey!" Lucky said 



"Well alright, looks like we goin shopping honey!"



Then Cindy took Ronnie to these gay friendly boutiques that lined up an down Canal street, buyin super fabulous $360 shoes, new $2000 gowns, new zesty $150 wigs, Cindy made sure that Ronnie looked absolutely stunning for his debut performance, and a first for Ronnie....some Botox! After getting some shots in the face and around his nose, Ronnie kinda felt different, an after spending at least $24,000 total Ronnie felt kinda uneasy, but Lucky assured him that it was for the best. It was the night of Ronnie's debut performance in a major setting, Lucky already booked Ronnie at a few prominent clubs around the city, the first show would be at the Cascade club in the French Quarter and it was huge! When Ronnie got to the club he saw how big it was, and he was kinda nervous but he was ready! 



"Just imagine this place being packed and folks adoring you, this is your destiny can't you see that!" Lucky said 



"Yesss, yesss, I'm gon slay this!"



It was evening time, and the club was packed, gay folks drinking an dancing, then around 9pm Ronnie came out onto the main stage to a supportive crowd, wondering what he was gonna do,



"Ladies an gentlemen, introducing, MISS RENEE HARVEY!" The Club owner said 



And Miss Renee Harvey came onto the stage and did a dance number to a dance remix of Ciara "1, 2 Step" and she wore a purple velvet corset with matching colored heels doing very risqué moves on stage! Then it was time to showcase the vocals, and Renee decided to do a song very close to her heart, "It Hurts like Hell" by Aretha Franklin and she WENT IN!! The crowd was so amazed they wanted Renee to do another song! So Renee sang her own rendition of "Living All Alone" by Phyllis Hyman and when Renee put her all into the song it was spectacular!! After Renee did another dance number on the stage the crowd was satisfied and gave her a roaring round of applause, Renee then went backstage, took off the wig and Ronnie knew his entertainment was done for the night, 



"Ooooooh that was fun!" Ronnie said in glee 



"Yes an you looked fabulous as hell, I told you that lacefront would do the trick it just complements the outfit, oh an that stage really made those cute shoes pop!" Said Cindy 



"Cindy, you ain't gotta kiss my ass the show is over.....BUT I DID LOOK CUTE THO HEYYY!" Ronnie shouted 



"How's my superstar doing yes yes, tonight was excellent, um can I speak to Ronnie alone for a minute?" Lucky said 



"Well Lucky how I do out there?" Ronnie asked 



"You did fantastic, I mean when you was singing Aretha oooh I almost cried, but enough of that, 750 people that's the attendance, this is the just the beginning, I got you booked at more clubs around the city and then the big one, your own show at the Orpheum theater it'll be huge!" Lucky said 



And when Ronnie heard this he became even more motivated, throughout the summer and fall of the year, Ronnie's appearances at various clubs really put him on the map and all at 18! Miss Renee Harvey was quickly becoming a gay club favorite and Lucky proposed that in the winter Ronnie go on a mini tour throughout the south in bigger gay hotspots such as Houston, 2 shows in Atlanta, 4 in Miami Beach and joined along other drag queens for a special New Years Eve performance in Orlando, and when Lucky gave Ronnie a check for $3800 it was like a dream come true.......at least so he thought.



2009



Ronnie started off the year with a lil break, he got on a plane an flew home to see his mom. Delilah was surprised to see Ronnie show up at the front door and saw the new designer clothes, Ronnie really made it for himself.



"Hey baby how you been?" Delilah asked 



"I been busy, mama it's so much fun bein in the road, seeing other gay folks, and all these people cheering for me it just made me feel like somebody!" Ronnie said 



"Well I'm doing fine, your auntie had a stroke so I don't know how she doing, it's so much goin on Ronnie sometimes Im just so tired....but I'm glad to see you doing well, that makes me real happy," Delilah said 



"You know mama imma get you up outta here,  don't worry I just gotta do more shows and...."



"Baby don't worry, you just do what you need to do I'm fine, the important thing is that you focus on yourself, I'm proud of you!" Delilah said 



"Thank you mama, for everything!" Said Ronnie as he hugged his mom 



Then Ronnie went out thru his old hood and saw how not much has changed, and he went to his gurl Marlo's house, he needed to see an old friend, 



"Heyyyyyy gurlllll!" Ronnie shouted 



"Bitch come in here yasss, lookin all fly in them boots those real cute.....so how you been!" 



"I Been performing in the clubs and bein a diva, gurl I swear it's like dream come true, if it wasn't for Tyrese takin me to that gay club awhile back I wouldn't be here right now, now I feel kinda bad I mean Tyrese was a good nigga, he was just DL," 



"Yeah about Tyrese, he um isn't here anymore," 



"Oh where his fine ass at?" 



"He killed himself....." Marlo said depressingly  



"What, why?" 



"Well he actually had a boyfriend on the side and some hatin ass niggas found out he was gay and they taunted him an the next thing ya know he jumped from the 10th floor of his apartment, so...."



And Ronnie was hurt by this, the boy who was his first crush was dead, but deep down he was glad that he ended it with Tyrese before shit hit the fan. After a lil one on one with Marlo and some of this other friends Ronnie went back to New Orleans where he was in for some surprises...







Chapter 5: A High Price To Pay

Ronnie came back to New Orleans and thought about how Tyrese killed himself, it made him feel so bad inside that niggas hated on him that much he had to take his own life! It also made Ronnie a lil thankful that her own friends and family accepted him for who he was, a man that liked to play dress up pretty much, but Ronnie was able to make a career out of it tho! When Ronnie got word that Kaleem was nominated for an award for best makeup artist he just had to be there! And he will be performing alongside a familiar face, Milwaukee Marla, at the GALA awards (GAY AN LESBIAN ASSOCIATION) at the Ritz Carlton ballroom in downtown and he was on his way to the dressing room when he saw Kaleem!



"Heyyy bitch congrats on yo nomination!!" 



"Yessss thank you I honestly didn't think I would win I mean I was up against Donovan Lamar and Willie B like omg they got huge following on Facebook but did you see how I slayed this bitch face!" Kaleem said as he showed Ronnie 



"Omg you gotta beat my face tonight cuz honestly the makeup artist they hired sucks like seriously the demonstration bitches in Dillard's do way better, but can be my MUA for tonight!" Ronnie asked 



"Bitch of course, listen I gotta go talk to these organizers over there so I'll meet you in the back soon but imma beat that face for the gawwds! HONEY YO FACE GON BE SOOO BLESSED YOU GON MAKE JESUS LOOK LIKE THEM MANNEQUINS!"



Then Kaleem went over to the other side of the room, while Ronnie hungry ass was on his way to the buffet when he bumped into a rather fine looking waiter....



"Ooooh I'm so sorry I dropped your scones!" Ronnie said 



"No it's okay, I'm a big fan of yours by the way, I'm not supposed to do this cause I'll get fired but I can have your autograph?" 



"No problem what your name hun?" 



"My name is Lance, and thanks so much!!" 



"You so welcome, um I was actually on my way to the buffet but since you here....can you get me some gumbo and chicken, some yams and bring it back to my dressing room, room 221?" Ronnie asked 



"Yeah I can do that!" Lance said 



"Perfect thanks!"



Then Lance left and Ronnie was kinda lookin back at him as he walked away, and he saw the buns Lance had and the fact he had a cute baby face too! Now Lance was white and Ronnie didn't mind a lil Swiss Miss, but he never had a crush on a white boy before, who knows where this could lead.....



Ronnie was back in the dressing room and Kaleem beat his face for the gawwds and he had on the best gown he ever wore glimmering silver and matching heels! It was time to be Renee Harvey when Lucky came into the dressing room, he was kinda drunk from the abundance of champagne in the hotel and Renee didn't know it but Lucky really was about to show his true colors,



"Damn you lookin fine tonight!" Said Lucky 



"You are drunk as hell chile!" Renee said 



"I just had a lil Moët that's all," 



"Um Lucky I just wanna say that I'm thankful for everything you done I mean this is a dream come true for me but I need to ask when am I gonna see the rest of my money, I only got $5500 and I just did this huge tour!" Renee asked 



"Don't worry more is coming, cmon would I cheat Miss Renee Harvey, naw never! I'll see it you get yo money honey!" 



Then as Renee turned around to get some more lipstick Lucky made a move and grabbed Renee on the ass! Renee didn't understand why Lucky was doing this, but as she kept flicking his hand off her ass he kept coming on to her!! 



"Cmon Renee after all I did for you at least let a nigga have some!" 



"Lucky you crazy as shit I'm not into you like that can you stop!!" Renee pleaded 



Then suddenly in an act of rage, LUCKY HIT RENEE IN THE FACE, GRABBING HER BY THE EXPENSIVE GOWN AN FORCING A KISS ON HER LIPS! RENEE PUSHED HIM OFF AND LUCKY WAS STARTING TO REALIZE WHAT HE DID!



"What the fuck is wrong with you!!" Ronnie shouted 



"I'm so sorry, please I'm so sorry please Ronnie I...I gotta get outta here!" Lucky said as he slipped out the room



And at that moment Ronnie was just frozen, like what just happened!! He was paralyzed for at least a few minutes to process what Lucky just did, when Lance came into the room and saw Ronnie all sad!



"Hey I got the food you wanted, are you okay Renee?" Lance asked 



"I'm fine just something on my mind, put the food on that table please,"



"Oh ok, I can't wait to hear you sing!!" said Lance so excited not knowing what Ronnie just went thru 



Ronnie knew he gonna have to deal with this later, the show must go on! So Ronnie became Renee again and went out into the ballroom where he got on stage and joined Milwaukee Marla as they sang together, with Renee thanking her for inspiration to do drag back in Chicago. Renee wanted to do a song in dedication to Tyrese suicide and suicide in the LGBT community so she decided that they should sing "One Sweet Day" by Mariah Carey and even tho Renee was still shaken by what Lucky did, it didn't hinder the performance tho and Renee sung the hell out that song, with the audience giving her a standing ovation, and Kaleem won the award that night and partied in the ballroom with Renee singing a dance song by Ziggy Funk called "What You Afraid Off" and with her voice it brought down the house!! Renee congratulated Kaleem and they had a lil glass of wine to celebrate!



"Omg yessss bitch you won!" 



"And you sang the fuck out that song Miss Renee CHEERS!"



Then Lance came by and served them both dessert, and having Ronnie smiling from ear to ear....and Kaleem noticed! 



"Ooooh what with that smile you like him?" Kaleem asked 



"I don't know what you talking about" Ronnie said trying to play it off



"Well he is cute, you better get you some of that vanilla!" 



And Ronnie started thinking, Lance was cute, and Ronnie was getting tired of the single life, so he was gonna keep Lance on his mind. Ronnie had to change back into his regular clothes in his dressing room when Lucky was sitting there, Ronnie knew they had to talk about that incident... 



"What do you want?"



"Look Ronnie I'm sorry, I should've never came on to you that way I apologize!"



"You hit me...."



"I said I was sorry please Ronnie don't do this!!" 



"You lucky I ain't sued yo ass or have you are arrested!



"I know you in your emotions, but Imma make this clear to you, you mine, and if you ever think about walking out.....kiss all this shit goodbye, including yo money!" Said Lucky 



"I'm leaving!" Ronnie protested as he stormed out the room



Ronnie was back in his apartment he was about to go to bed, when suddenly he got a call from Aunt Bessie, it was serious! Apparently Delilah was out grocery shopping in the south side when a gang related shooting happened and she was caught in the crossfire, she was in the hospital getting checked out after getting struck in the leg and in the neck! Thankfully she was okay but Ronnie rushed back up to Chicago to see her in the hospital!



"Momma, momma are you okay, please wake up!!" 



"She's fine Ronnie she just gave her some sedative, but she was real lucky, oooooh these streets are ruthless, just out minding ya business and this shit happens!" Aunt Bessie said 



"Well just as long as she's okay then I'm okay." 



"Well you ain't be okay after you hear this, this hospital bill $37,000 and yo mom ain't got no insurance, now she gon miss work an can't pay her other bills oh lord Jesus how we gon pay this, Ronnie you the superstar can you please help us out we drowning here!"



Then Ronnie thought, watching his mom on the hospital bed he knew he only had $3,000 to his name despite all the revenue from shows, and he knew he couldn't make it on his own for Lucky was basically powerful enough to break his career! Then Ronnie went back to New Orleans and decided to go to Lucky's office and talk......but Lucky wanted to see him at his house, which was a huge mansion near the lakefront neighborhood and when Ronnie got there he made the hardest decision of his life! 



"Lucky, I'm sorry for walking out in you the other day, and I accept your apology, but I really really need the money!"



"I told you Ronnie once you walk away from Lucky you on your own....."



"Please....I'll do anything!"



"Well in that case.....I want you layin next to me tonight, I'll love you up real nice, and then after you let me caress, and touch, all parts of you then I might reconsider...." Lucky said 



Ronnie had no choice, even tho he was 19 and Lucky was 40, Ronnie had nowhere else to turn, and Lucky was the one who brought him into this entertainment world, and was the one with the money that would solve all of His issues! So Ronnie agreed to go upstairs with Lucky to his bedroom, and have sex with him......Lucky wasn’t even cute his body was all kinds unsexy, an he was kinda of a freak, he would slob, he would lick, he was not romantic, AT ALL it was like being pounded by a wolverine! After that embarrassing 10 minute sex Lucky orgasmed and fell asleep.....and as Ronnie laid there on those satin sheets, numb to the feeling of Lucky's dick, Ronnie had a tear rolling down his face.......like was the money worth it?



Chapter 6: Taken Advantage Of

It had been a week since Ronnie submitted himself an laid with Lucky, he also gave up the apartment Lucky got him and moved into Luckys big house, and almost every night of sexual abuse....but thru his suffering he finally got his money, $300,000!! But even tho Ronnie was able to take care of his moms bills and himself, he was still working for the man who could instantly break his career if Ronnie didn't do what he wanted, and many nights Ronnie regretted saying yes to Lucky and his nasty ways, the nigga barely used lube.....which made the terrible sex even worse! Ronnie wanted to tell friends so badly but he at the same time he didn't want anybody to know what he was going thru, he was really ashamed, but he was still Miss Renee Harvey and the shows must go on! A hot new gay rapper, "Lil Bussy" was doing a live performance for his song "FUCKBOY" and he wanted Renee Harvey to sing the hook! The feature was a huge break for Renee and introduced her to a more urban gay crowd, and a big fat check too! The concert was at City Park with all types of gays and they were so hype at Lil Bussy and when Renee Harvey came thru singin the crowd instantly fell in love with her! 



"YEAH, ALL YALL GIVE IT UP FOR MY SIS MISS RENEE!!!" Shouted Lil Bussy 



"YASSSS IM SO HAPPY TO BE WIT YALL I FEEL SO LOVED AND ME AN BUSSY HERE MIGHT COLLAB ON SOME MORE SHIT CUZ THIS SHIT HOT!" Renee shouted on the mic 



After the crowd cheered Renee on and he got paid, Ronnie decided to that he wanted to have some fun an went to Tiptronia, a bar near the park, and to his surprise.....HE SAW LANCE, THE CUTR SERVER FROM THE HOTEL, SITTING AT A TABLE BY HIMSELF!



"Lance omg I didn't know you worked here? It's me Renee Harvey just in my true form (laughs)"



"Oh shit, I didn't know you eat here, but yeah this like my other job!" Lance said 



"Oh no this like my first time here and are you sittin here by yo lonesome self? Ronnie asked 



"Yeah I'm on my lil break, this place got real good food I'm tellin you!"



"Can you show me...." Ronnie said with his hormones acting up again 



Then Ronnie sat down with Lance and after having some drinks and one on one time, Ronnie got to know this boy a lil better, and the connection was insane! Lance told him about how me moved to New Orleans from Florida, and how he dreamed of opening a restaurant one day, that's why he was working in the food service to get a feel of what people liked, and plus he got major tips! Ronnie opened up about how he grew up and became Renee, but Ronnie left out the part where Lucky was taking advantage of his financial need, and the fact he was pretty much sexually abusing him! But Ronnie didn't wanna ruin the moment, Lance was so sexy!! Ronnie couldn't take his eyes off this delicious white man, and for a few hours he was actually with a man who he really liked...



When it was over Ronnie was super drunk, and Lance decided to take Ronnie home, which was actually Luckys house. And Ronnie didn't want to get out the car but he knew he had to, it was after 1am and he was hoping Lucky was asleep, so Ronnie gave Lance his number!



"I had such a wonderful time tonight, those hurricanes blew me AWAY!!" Ronnie rambled 



"(Laughs) yeah they potent, but I hope we can hang out again, you're so fun to talk to!" Lance said 



"You are great to talk to too, and you seem like a good friend, something I could really use right now...." Ronnie said 



"Is there something wrong, you wanna tell me about it?" Lance asked 



"No just a lot on my mind, thanks again and since you work for the catering company I assume you'll be at the drag concert tomorrow night,"



"Yeah actually I will, I can't wait to see you!" Lance said 



Then as Lance drove off, Ronnie slowly went inside the house and it was dark, an at first Ronnie thought he was in the clear and that he could go to bed until suddenly......LUCKY TURNS ON THE LIGHTS AND GRABS RONNIE BY HIS SHIRT, PRETTY MUCH SHAKING RONNIE UP AND THROWING HIM AGAINST THE WALL, HE WAS YELLING AND RONNIE STARTED SHEDDING TEARS AS LUCKY BERATED HIM!!



"WHERE THE FUCK WERE YOU! YOU FORGOT YOU SPOSE TO GIVE ME SOME I BEEN WAITING UP ALL NIGHT FO YOUR ASS, you know what.....if you ain't gon give me any, imma just take it!!" Lucky yelled 



Then Lucky dragged Ronnie onto the couch and Ronnie was trying to fight him off, but Lucky pulled off his pants and gave Ronnie unwanted sloppy!! Then Lucky got on top of Ronnie and tried to kiss on him and go inside him but Ronnie fought back and pushed the man off! BUT THEN LUCKY PUNCHED RONNIE IN THE FACE AND RONNIE HAD ENOUGH!! Then when Lucky got tired of Ronnie he left him crying in pain on the couch, while Lucky went to his bedroom upset, and at that moment Ronnie really wanted to be with Lance.....



The next day Ronnie put on his good face and acted like nothing happen, but once Ronnie got to the rehearsal for the show, he was wearing shades, he didn't want anybody to see the black eye Lucky gave him, then as he was doing his makeup, Lance surprisingly came in.



"Hey Ronnie I got your food!" 



"Thanks just put it right there!" 



"Okay.....Is that black eye? Ronnie are you okay...."



"IM FINE, just a little drunken accident that's all didn't mean to yell," 



"Ok well if you need to talk you have my number!"



Then as Lance left Ronnie thought about maybe telling somebody what he was going thru, but it was no time to harp on pain, Renee Harvey had a show to do. Renee sang along side other drag queens in a sold out venue that was super packed! Then all the queens joined together an sang "That's What Friends Are For" and Renee showed out! Her voice goin high is it can and the crowd loved it! It was after the show an Ronnie went into the back an tried to change clothes, he was done being a diva when Lucky came in an had the money, $50,000 to be exact! 



"Yeah I got your money, but first you gon give me what I want,"



Lucky once again pulled down Ronnie's pants an did his oral transaction, Ronnie wasn't even hard but Lucky didn't care, he just sucked away, and after he was done he gave Ronnie his money...and a kiss on his cheek with his crusty lips! Ronnie was just glad Lucky didn't punch him, but he had enough! The next weekend after all those shows an dealing with Lucky Ronnie took a plane to Chicago to see his mom an aunt Bessie. Delilah was doing better after the shooting and every penny of the hospital bill was paid off, but Ronnie was about to reveal the suffering he went thru to get that money! 



"Hey mama how you doing?" 



"I'm fine, I really have to thank you honey I was practically drowning in those bills, I thought I never make it but my superstar baby cane thru!" 



"Yes Ronnie thank you so much, and I liked that bag you sent me, I never had real Gucci before!" Said aunt Bessie 



"Why the long face chile?" Asked Delilah 



"Mom you know I love you, and I do anything to make sure you straight, but that money didn't come from shows..."



"Where it came from then?" Aunt Bessie asked 



"Lucky, he said that if...(crying) he said if I didn't let him do it he...he wouldn't give it to me!!" Cried Ronnie as he revealed the abuse 



"Let him do what? RONNIE WHAT THIS MAN DOING TO YOU!!" Delilah raised her voice



"My money wasn't right, and you were in that hospital (crying) and I don't know why he just wasn't fair with my money so I asked him and he said hell only give me my money if I let him...(crying) hell only give it to me if I let him!"



"Ronnie did that man touch you?" Asked Aunt Bessie 



"He does more than touch me, we actually have sex, and He won't stop mama (crying) I tell him to stop but he won't listen....and when I refuse he hits me (crying) he hits me he gave me a black eye, and I tried to be strong about it but I can't stop him, (crying) I'm sorry mommy!!" Cried Ronnie as he let it all out



Then at that moment Ronnie broke down an cried, and Delilah tried to comfort her son and just felt so guilty that he sacrificed his dignity and virginity and maybe his health just to pay her bills! And even tho Ronnie loved his career, to go thru this just for money wasn't worth it, and Delilah had to tell her son the painful truth!



"Ronnie baby listen to me, stop crying it'll all be okay, I am eternally grateful for what you did for me but (crying) but imma need you to get away from this man, he's hurting you baby! It's hurting me to my soul to see you like this!!" 



"Ronnie you need to get away from this man he's done terrible things to you!! Did he use condoms?" Bessie asked 



"(Crying).....no" Ronnie revealed 



"Oh my god, YOU LISTEN TO ME, YOU ARE STAYING HERE YOU HEAR ME!! YOU AINT GOING BACK THERE, NOT UNTIL WE GET A DAMN LAWYER OR SOMBEBODY CAUSE WE FIGHTING THIS!" Aunt Bessie shouted 



"(Crying) mom I'm sorry, I'm so sorry!" Ronnie cried 



"Don't you worry baby, it's all over, you safe now you with me!" Delilah said comforting Ronnie 



Then Ronnie stayed with his family in his Chicago and friends as were there too to help him thru, but as the emotional damage began to set in, Ronnie felt a rage burning inside him!







Chapter 7: Diary of A Mad Ronnie

It had been a week since Ronnie came back home and let out all the sexual an physical abuse that was going on with Lucky! And Lucky was blowing up the phone too, Ronnie knew he was angry but he didn't care, the abuse took such as toll on him emotionally that sometimes he couldn't even eat. Family encouraged Ronnie to go to a therapist and deal with emotional pain he had. When Ronnie went to a therapist he told him all the stuff and how guilty he felt that it was all his fault and that he was so sad because his life wasn't meant to be this way....



"It's okay Ronnie, you thought you did what was right for your mom and many times we feel it's our own fault that things go south thinking you could've said no, could've thought of a different way, but what happened happened and we can't get back yesterday, you just need to avoid him at all cost and don't focus all your anger on what he did to you that's more draining!" Said the therapist



"(Crying) I just hate the way he made me feel, like I wish it never happened and he hit me and touched me I just...I can't!!!" Ronnie broke down 



"Just give it some time, perhaps write down some notes of how exactly you're feeling at the moment to get it out of your system, and in the mean time I prescribed some anti-depressants to help you cope with any pain you feeling," said the therapist 



Then once the session was over, Ronnie went back home and decided to jot down the things that were going on into this notebook, he would just be glued to the notebook most of day as if he was writing a book! Soon Marlo decided to come over to Ronnie's house and be with him, also give him some much needed advice to move on with his life.



"Knock knock bitch!" Marlo said 



"Hey you guys!" Ronnie said



"Just came by to check on you boo, yo mom said you been handling it but you know you Ronnie, you can always talk to me or Lauree Kaleem cause we yo Day ones!" 



"I know, and I'm glad I have friends like y'all, but girl, it's been so rough, I'm going to therapy even taking these happy pills but I still feel like it just happened yesterday I don't why, I don't know where to start over cuz he hurt me so fuckin bad 



"Ronnie I'm gonna tell you something that I've never told anybody before.....when I was 15 I was abused by this nigga I was seein, he hurt me so bad that I cried for weeks, while he went and did his own thang like nothin happened!" 



"What you do gurl?" 



"I got me a Louisville slugger and went over to his place, he was all up on his new hoe, and I came unexpected and swung as hard as I could knocked the nigga right out, broke almost all his shit and I got my power back!"


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